SO, I'm lazy. On the other hand, you're getting this for free. So who's really the lazy one?
Ok it's me, as evidenced by the utter lack of pictures accompanying this post. Mea Culpa, I'll do better next time.
* Mihwangsa
Went to a Buddhist temple. Stayed the night. Partied with monks. Climbed a mountain, and looked over the sea in both directions. Also, gained Squat Toilet Skillz. Awww, yeah, gimme some.
* Seoul Drum Festival
Let's talk about something that happened awhile back, the pictures of which are blurred beyond the awesome powers of Adobe: the Seoul Drum Festival.
It had been awhile since we'd been oot and aboot -- drinking-establishments excluded, of course -- and enough had become enough; before Theresa got here, we'd decided that we were going to spur each other to take advantage of the strange metropolis of Seoul, and that didn't seem to be happening as much as we'd have liked.
Enter the Seoul Drum Festival. Directions: combine the following words into a state of ridiculous fun:
- Seoul Forest
- giant stage
- keytar
- synth drums
- hair band
- breakdancing demon
- fire
- mob of koreans.
Ok, stream of consciousness narrowly avoided, let's see what the hell I'm talking about. We got there well after nightfall, having missed an act or two. The band onstage consisted of 3 guys with synthetic quad-drums and a drum machine, backed up by a girl on a dais with a huge keytar. It was loud. It was cool. At one point, they swapped their drums for sensors placed on their bodies, and played by smacking, patting, and chest-bumping. Fun Was Had By All.
The next band was a jazz band. There was a Korean drummer. I think. They played Hawaii 5-0, and When the Saints Come Marching In. Confusion Was Shared By Most.
Then came an Indonesian (possibly) band, comprised of around 10 guys, half of whom were sitting. Complex rhythms evolved from simple "pass around the beat" stints, and it got faster and louder -- the natural evolution of drums, it would seem. Some guys used their feet to change the pitch. There was some vocalization that can only be described as hooting, much to the delight of the many children present, or at least those still awake. Q: Who can sleep during a drum festival? A: Sleep-deprived Korean kids.
Anywho, we debated whether we should stick out the increasing chilliness for the "Closing Ceremony," which would consist of... we had no idea. Probably the emcee and a long-winded speech about culture.
Curiosity won out over the urge for self-preservation, or perhaps avenged the latter as our legs were frozen to the ground at this point, and we stayed. We were, how you say?, pleasantly surprised.
The Closing Ceremony consisted of 5 sequential acts, each more ridiculous than the last -- prompting repeated statements to the effect of, "Woah. No way they can beat tha- hang on..."
In the first, a long-haired, bearded and mustachioed, "just stepped out of a movie set at least a thousand years ago," drummer took the stage, three drumsticks in each hand. After some dramatic flourishing and mood-lighting, he managed to find his huge drum set, and proceeded to enact what could best be described as "what it would sound like if an avalanche had style."
The second act opened with a few dancers. They crossed the stage gracefully, opening and closing fans in time with the man -- referred to henceforth as "Animal" from the muppets. The drumming and dancing intensified; Animal started Headbanging in time with his own drumming. He was soon joined, drum- and headbang-wise, by two of the dancers, who turned out to be drummers after all. Three robed, possessed-looking drummers headbanging in-sync is a sight one does not soon forget. It was not, however, the finale, even of the act, as the remaining 3 dancers were joined by a breakdancing, masked demon. I can't quite explain how, but the juxtaposition of the flowing, graceful, Korean style and the frantically interrupted-yet-sinuous movements of the breakdancer were mesmerizing. This, we were sure, as the lights went out, could not be topped.
The lights didn't come back on for a bit. Just as I was rousing my legs to life, more drumming came from the still unlit stage. Unlit, yet... holy #$%^, their drumsticks are on fire. Sometimes, your mind actually thinks in censored noises. Afterimages rhythmically blazed across the stage, too faint for my cellphone camera, but clearly visible in the chilly darkness of evening. Surely this, we knew must be the finale.
A question that has plagued philosophers since the time of Aristotle was about to be answered: If a tree falls in Seoul Forest, and nobody hears it over the fiery drumming of the festival musicians, what beats breakdancing demons and pyrotechnics? The answer?
Breakdancing demons, pyrotechnics, and a four-way sword fight.
Eventually the flames were extinguished, but not before armed dancers took the stage. Imagine the part of a kung fu movie it's one guy against all the others. Drums pounding in the background, he manages to fight one off, only to have his foe replaced by two, three more sword-wielding attackers. Now, imagine that he's spinning on his head, fending off the stabs of three lethally graceful fan dancers with straight swords. Add in the crazed thrashings of our long-haired drummer trio, and you've got yourself a ballgame. Except, you know, interesting to watch.
Anyway, the following (and final) act involved putting water on the drum heads to make up for the obvious lack of spectacle in any of the preceding acts. Also, Animal jumped on his drums at one point. There was a video in the background, all the Koreans chanted something akin to "Viva Korea!" in a startling display of, well, emotion. At the end, the crowd flooded the stage, interrupted, frustrated, and finally chased away the emcee.
All in all, it was a good night.
* The Won
This post is getting out of hand. The idea was to be quick. So, here goes. The won has, alternately: lost, gained, risen, fallen, exploded, sucked, been unpegged, come unglued, skyrocketed, plummeted, gained me moneys, lost me moneys, lost me 'earties, lost me monkeys, upchucked, downsized, inflated, popped, and died.
It will, one hopes, resurrect in a few months. Otherwise, my salary is being paid in Zombie Bucks, and could turn out to have the buying power similar to shells and beads, only a few millennia late.
* Christmas
I may come home. If I do, it will be from Dec. 23- Jan. 3rdish. Hide your women and children.
* Online sibling absence
Tasha is probably dead. I haven't received so much as a facebook poke from my errant, soon to be erstwhile twin. Let it be Proclaiméd here and now: I get her stuff.
* Work
Is boring. I am at work. And bored. Latest batch of quotes from students, in response to
Me: "Why do you want to visit the US?"
Student A: "For free lady. Teacher, how you call free lady?"
Me: "Free... ladies? Er..."
Student A: [Pantomimes]
Me: "... The Statue of Liberty?"
Student A: "Yes. I like free stajoo lady."
Student B: "I want to go USA and see Batman, Superman, and Obama."
- K
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